...........she was sent to save me.......she was sent to complete me.....

Today is 30 days since the discovery of the cancer within me.

I have now embarked upon my second of four counterattacks against this death....and I am hopeful that this evil is now running a bit scared. You see up until 30 short days ago...it was destroying me without my knowledge and therefore was celebrating my demise without fear of losing its campaign to bury me.

But now I am fighting back!!

Thanks to the efforts of Dr. Joel Sheinfeld and Dr. George Bosl we have a plan and are effectuating it with renewed grit and determination.

I have two more hours of Etoposide to be fed into my bloodstream as I type these words and I have already received ninety minutes of Cisplatin.

With the help of heaven....it will be a war fought through to victory!!!

Today is another anniversary. The most special of anniversaries.

Lisa and I went on our first date together twenty four years ago today.

The first time You sent Lisa to me Hashem was before I was born.

Judaism holds that prior to our coming to this world we are a complete soul....unified with our other half in shamayim...in heaven.

When we arrive in this world....we arrive separated from our other half and if we merit it....we are reunited with our beshert....our destiny....reunited with the other half of our soul and made complete once again...for the first time in this world.

Well...it was twenty four short years ago today that You sent Lisa to me....and me to Lisa.

Having been introduced through mutual friends....after Lisa having made her way to Philadelphia following her wonderful sister Wendy to "The City of Brotherly Love"....Wendy having fallen in love with and marrying my wonderful brother in law Marc Rudofker.

Thinking about it over the years and again now....it all seems so improbable...but then again Lisa was my beshert and You run the world.....

We were destined to be together and so it was....twenty four years ago today we met for the first time.

That was the occasion of our first date....that was the moment that my life and my destiny changed for all time.

Lisa was 23....I was 26....and all moved quite swiftly from there.

We were married under Your watchful eye the following year and we have enjoyed a life together full of blessing ever since....all the while moving closer and closer to You.

Every Friday evening....every Erev Shabbos...I have the privilege and joy of singing Ayshet Chayil to my precious Lisa before our sumptuous Shabbos meal.

"A good wife who can find? She is more precious than corals. her husband places his trust in her and only profits thereby. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life......She is robed in strength and dignity and she smiles at the future. She opens her mouth with wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks after the conduct of her household and never tastes the bread of laziness. Her children rise up and make her happy; her husband praises her: Many women have excelled, but you outshine them all! Grace is elusive and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears Hashem - she shall be praised. Give her credit for the fruit of her labors and let her achievements praise her at the gates."

That is my precious Lisa.

Together we have raised two magnificent children Adam and Danielle who we are hopeful will continue to live lives that exemplify all that is good and bring favor to You as You watch from the heavens.

Judaism teaches that "it is the wisdom of women that builds the home".

This could not be more true and more clear in our family. It has been Lisa alone whose wisdom has built our home and it has been Lisa's quiet determination and sweet kindness that has so shaped Adam and Danielle.

How fitting then that You send Lisa to save me once again which will hopefully afford me an opportunity to fulfill my destiny here in this world.

It will never be lost on me that it was Lisa who sent me to the doctor on my 50th birthday. It was Lisa's wisdom that once again carried the day and it will be in her merit...should You allow me to live Hashem ...that the mission of the rest of my years will be credited.

It has always fascinated me to no end since it "came" to me four years ago when studying our ketubah...our marriage contract that the acronym of our hebrew names....shin for Shena....lamed for Leah....and mem for Michael....when fused and joined as one spells SHALEM.

Shalem which means completeness and peace.

That cannot be and of course is not a coincidence. Lisa and I complete one another and I thank you Hashem for allowing us to have reunified our neshamas here in this world as we had been before being born.

So beautiful....so magical....

Lisa has protected me as You have protected us always.

Lisa has been the most beautiful ezer kenegdo...the most beautiful helper who is my equal / who stands opposite me....exactly as You instructed her to be in Your holy Torah.

Twenty four years ago it was Lisa's wisdom that completed me....it was Lisa's kindness that altered my destiny for the good and it was You Hashem that sent Lisa to save me.

And so history repeats itself.

It is clear to me Hashem that You have again sent Lisa....and as I type these letters while the last of today's chemotherapy floods into my bloodstream...I remain hopeful that with Your rachamim....with Your mercy....we will have been afforded enough time to save me.

Master of the Universe I could not be more grateful to You....You have provided me with all I have ever needed and You have treated me with such kindness....as You are indeed doing so now.

Thank you Hashem.

......for having sent her.

B'simcha and with gratitude to You,
michael